Sitting on my hands

 I am passionate about my hobby, not just cooking. I love to see and be at events no matter what side of the crew I am on. Running it, participation or a combo of both. 

I suppose the reason I am putting all this here is to remind myself of what I was/ am feeling and why. A record for me to look at to help me analyze how to improve my relationship with my hobby.

I volunteered to run Spring crown this past year out of that passion, the drive to see things get done. No, not a 'I must do it or it won't get done' but a 'someone has to do it, I can do it, me doing it will relieve the pressure off of others that have been doing it a long time and those that may not be ready to take on such a big project.' 

12th night coronation needs to be done. I have only a pair of things on my plate, I could do it, but I won't. I am still trying to figure out some things from post SCT (Spring Crown Tournament). I do not have the confidence I had going into that event and that will take time to rebuild. I have been frustrated lately with many aspects of the organizational side of my hobby and it has 'crisped my edges' I guess. 

So, as to keep from getting further burned out, I need to let go, I need to accept that I can not fix everything, that path only leads to ruin. I do hope that someone out there steps up, someone in a better place to be able to manage the event. Someone with a thicker skin than I have/had. And I hope that person does it from a genuine desire to run the event and not an 'I'll do it cause no one else will.'